Development of relationship and intimacy skills
a clients perspective
Below my client talks about how learning intimacy and relationship skills, through seeing a sex worker, she has been able to find the romantic relationship she wanted. She came to see me because she wanted to have a long term committed relationship and she wanted to understand what she was capable of exploring physically, and she wanted to advance her dating skills. As a sex worker, sex is only one part of what I provide to my clients and my client explains the additional skills which sex workers provide to their clients.
I have had the fortune of working with many people who have yet to loose their virginity and wish to do so in a manner that is planned, caring and secure and some have not had the opportunity to experience relationship building and want to have a long term relationship. Sex workers can provide a stepping stone for clients who want to build intimacy, relationship and specific social skills. I really enjoyed the connection I had with this wonderful client, and I am unbelievably happy that she is happily in a committed relationship and that our professional relationship has ended. I sincerely wish her all the happiness in the world.
‘I first met Tallula when I was 39 years old, I hadn’t had a lot of luck with love and I wanted to explore my sexuality. I didn’t want to become a 40-year-old virgin like the old movie.
I first became aware of Tallula when I was put in contact with the fabulous not for profit, named Touching Base, they match people with disability up with sex workers who have a great understanding of the needs of people with disability.
I did quite a lot of research before I decided to make contact. I was, of course, very nervous and if I’m being completely honest slightly ashamed. There is always been a stigma around sex and disability, but with a little bit of coercing from my friends, I decided to make contact.
This was quite possibly the best decision of my life.
Before we began our first meeting, we had quite a lengthy discussion of my needs and what I was hoping to achieve by engaging with her. I explained that I wanted to learn the skills to one day help me find the love of my life. I didn’t want to go into a brand-new relationship without knowing what I could do to please another person.
While we were together, Tallula taught me how to express my needs and desires. At times I felt like it was cruel because all I wanted her to do was ravish me, but she made me express exactly what I wanted and needed before she would do anything. Some days I wanted nothing more than pure unbridled sex, other times I just wanted to lay there with her cuddling. She was able to fulfil every one of my needs. We even got the opportunity to see a live show. There is nothing better than watching a show and holding her hand whilst sneaking in a few tender kisses. It really is the full girlfriend experience.
Over time, Tallula was able to build my confidence and I finally decided to put myself on the market. I’m not going to pretend that this was easy, in fact, I was out there for quite awhile trying to find that special person with absolutely no luck. So many people would match with me and when I told them that I was in a wheelchair they would completely ghost to me.
Finally, one I made a match with someone who completely blew my mind, she is absolutely perfect in every single way.
After a few weeks of texting and calling we both decided to meet each other in real life. She is perfection and we complement each other completely.
I told her early in the relationship that I had engaged with a sex worker and while she was slightly surprised, she could understand why I needed to do this. When we finally did make love, it was mind blowing. She is incredibly grateful to Tallula for teaching me everything I know.
I will be forever grateful to Tallula for helping me believe that I am lovable and a sexual human being. She is an amazing person who will always have a special piece of my heart.’
